September 9, 2010 at 3:03 pm (Life)

well now. I am not feeling the best but Bullet was pretty good so back to the world of Oz until honeymoon time. I was never close to many girls and so I went to a women’s college to try and understand relationships between women. The wedding process has shown me what I have known for many years I compartmentalize even my friends. To some I show one side of myself and to others something different and when those opposites meet it becomes very awkward. I don’t get angry and I don’t throw people away I just learn how much energy should be placed into maintaining communication. The wedding has shown me I have wasted some energy on some and need to refocus that energy onto others. Some days it’s enough to just get thru the day.

My husband to be thinks I will change once we are married or so he told me last night. This upset me but I was feeling too sick to really have this conversation with him. Yes some things will change – I want to have children – keyword – someday. Yes it is getting closer – I am 30 I want to have a life once they are gone, but I don’t want my kids to take over my life the way they did my mom’s. So I guess he and I have to have another conversation about this.

Also I have joked that our house is haunted because the cat seems to meow and get agitated at walls and the air. I mean it was built in the 1870’s and not alot but enough updates have been done. Well seems mr. thinks there is a chance too 🙂 he just hates to admit it!

also my face is seriously breaking out  i know a lot of it is stress but I mean really come on wedding and major pictures in 9 days its bad enough i was completely hung over for the bridal shower pictures lets hope my face clears for these ones!


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